Perceptional Process

Where I born was a place that everyone is judging to each other in every minute, what kind of brand you are dressing, what kind of house you are leave, what university you gradated.

People are actually good at judging in my city, some of them may know half of your background at the first glance. Wearing normal clothes and handbags without any brands, enter to many famous shop, the waiters or staffs won’t come to serve you until the last second because they think you are not going to buy lots of things. If a guy never studied in university and having an average salary job, maybe it is quite normal, but in my city this an example of loser. It means this person will never can afford a housing and feeding his family, unless his parents is rich.  Most of the parents don’t want their daughter to marry with this kind of guy, and they will want to kick you out of their house when you are living in the government rental apartment.  This our culture.

In my high school time, some of my classmates who never a friend of mine, they always think I am a very boring person and I suffer in my grades because of I was silent and always daydreaming in my high school classes. Some of them even thinks that I am a gangster too (It’s true my high school have some students are really gangster before, but one the them was one of my best friend and I never was a gangster.) just because I am much bigger than the others in size. Even the officers sometimes will pull over when I was walking on the side if I wasn’t wearing my school uniform.

Honestly I also judge people at the first time I meet. Tattoos in our culture were only seen on people who are gangsters, doesn’t like America everyone have tattoos. I have a friend who has more than 20 kinds of tattoo on his back. Like the others, at first I was also quite scary when I was talking with him, I thought he will be get angry very easy and very mean. In fact he is a Christian and very nice to everyone, I thought he was really a gangsters controlling some place but he just a simple train driver and go to work every morning. He get tattoos because of his terrible childhood and marriage, so tattoos help him revive a bit. His was truly nice to friends, better than some people don’t have tattoo, smile anytime, dress a nice suit but want you to sign their contract and suck all of your money.

Authentic Self

The content of this week classes are very impressive, especially about Eric his own story and the self-concept. They all influenced me to think about many things about myself and I never stop to look at how I live my life.

Since I was born, everything were very harsh and hurry to me, and they all seems to make me get in to the university, because from where I born applied to college is a very huge competition, only 1 out of 10 high school student can get applied. When I was studying in elementary school, the school was one of the top school, I did have good grades but my parents still took me to have after school tutor for hours, 5 days a week to maintain my grades, when I was in the third grade, 9 years old. At the time, I never felt happy for a second in my life, when my friends have video games to play and watching TV all day long, I might just back to home at 8 p.m. or still tutoring. I may have held good grades but i never could fit myself into my friends at my elementary school because they were all talking about things I don't have a chance to know like games and TV shows. I was not living for myself, but for my parents and those people expected so high to me.

Although it was a very tough, but my parents were happy when they saw my grades, I used to be the top 5 in the class, I thought that is enough to make myself keep working. When I get older, like 14 or 15. I realized that what I did before in elementary school were all meaningless and I gave up to do homework and started to skip half of my classes, because our education system is so ridiculous that it is only students who can remember all contents of textbooks can have good grades and it is designed to collect the elites to university and they don’t give anything to these can’t. That is also why I am here in U.S..

At that time I finally felt like I was being myself, I learn whatever I want to learn, I go wherever I want to go, like I never like playing music, I just listen to them ,so than I throw my Musical Instruments into the trash can and start to learn martial art every day and week. You can't do something good when you don’t like it. I got a black belt in several years and I quit because I find my master don’t have any more things to teach me and they are starting to suck money. But later then I found another master who can show an other new level of martial art, so I went to Martial art gym every week before i came to U.S.. I did skip regular school class  but I am not lazy because I never stop learning new things. 

More I know what is happening in my city and the world. I know that what people are trying to poison you and make you their slaves and people who are truly care and want to help you. I know my parents push me so hard because they want me to be able to take care myself. Also I never listen to these advises to these people pretending they are helping you but indeed they know nothing about me, nothing about our society, what they telling you actually poisons, because all people from where I grew up love seeing other people fail. I realize what I was doing in the elementary school were exactly the self-defeat drivers, be prefect, be strong, be perfect. I never felt happy because I was living to be like other expecting me to be, but that is not me.

Hi I'm Raiden Lau and the Chinese name is Tin Hang Lau, born and raise in Hong kong. This is the first time I use the Blog, I never use anything like this kind of things before that. It is interesting to use the Blog for the college class.

I just came the United States for almost one and half year. This year is my first year to study in Dixie ,before that i was studying in Portland, it was a very nice place that the weather even in summer is still around 70 degrees in average. Hong Kong, the place i grown up is so different to United States that Hong Kong is a very small city but living with some many people. Hence that is very relaxing to live in United States, you don't always have to stay in some place full of people.

Dixie is a nice school, everyone is very nice, right now I'm almost finished the general educations. Professors and friends i met here they are all very nice and friendly.  Also that are so many international students like me studying here, so i never felt too lonely to study here. I love playing video game and exercising, specially martial art and working out. United State and Dixie are very nice but i already left from my home for coming to 2 years, maybe soon i will to find some time to go back and see my family and friends.